I am a cat, I am perfect no matter what I do. My people tell me so all the time. Sometimes I toy with them to see how far I can take this.
If I want them to pet me, I rub up against them and snuggle, only the way that “I” can. They are eager to please me, so they pet me. When I am finished, they must stop. I bite them & they stop. They discuss amongst themselves how precious I am anyway. I am a beautiful cat, I can get away with this because it’s all about me.
When I want my people to give me a treat, I yell at them, in only the way that “I” can. They desire to please me, so they drop what they are doing & they bring me my treat. Even though I secretly want it, I pretend like I don’t. They bring me an assortment of treats, hoping something will be to my liking. My people think it is so adorable that I am finicky. Yes, I am a finicky cat, I can get away with this because it’s all about me.
When I want to play, I act playful. I may bat at their clothing, or indicate in any number of ways that I want to play, in only the ways that “I” can. They are thrilled to play with me, so I let them. They try to get my attention with a wide array of toys. I find this amusing. In fact, their desire to please me is more amusing than playing. As I said, I like to toy with them, so I become disinterested. They keep trying to play, so I claw at them. I use my nails, & it probably hurts. I don’t care because I am aloof & self absorbed. My people talk about how becoming this is, & that I appear majestic & regal. Yes, I am truly magnificent in my egocentricity. I can get away with this because it’s all about me.
You, on the other hand, are not me. When you attempt to behave this way, you are manipulative & narcissistic. After all, I am a cat, & it really is all about me.